I finally figured out what age and experience have given me. An arsenal.
As provided by Amber, who was drunk:
“Lucy alived. She is a person.”
Turns out if you’re in the work world long enough, and you end up somewhere where people respect what you do and know who you are, you get asked to be on interview committees. This can also happen if you get to supervise student workers. These things have indeed happened to me, so I feel like I can speak with a little bit of authority. There are a fuck-ton of tips for interviews out there and mine may be no different, but know that I am an individual on a committee, and not a corporation trying to generate web content.
1) DRESS WELL. Seriously, we are so into your appearance, and we notice everything. It doesn’t matter how we are dressed. We are hypocrites in that arena and we do not care. Unless you’re in black tie, you can’t overdress. We never look at each other afterwards and say, “Man, we do NOT need a dude wearing a business suit around this joint.”
2) DON’T LIE. It is incredibly, painfully obvious when you do. And we won’t feel sorry for you. We’ve probably got at least 10 other people who want the job and didn’t lie.
3) BE THOROUGH on your resume. We will pounce on it like angry dogs and ferret out any inconsistencies. You can give us good reasons in the interview, but you’re coming from a position of suspicion by that point.
4) KNOW YOUR SHIT. As with lying, we can tell when you don’t.
5) IF YOU DON’T KNOW, say so. We totally respect that. Also, go home and find the answer, then email it to us with your thank you. We love that shit.
6) EMAIL A THANK YOU. You can send a snail-mail one too if you like, but do something. And email is faster. We’re more likely to remember.
7) HAVE QUESTIONS for us. If you say you don’t, we feel weird. Ask us something, even if you know the answer.
8) BUT DON’T ASK IF YOU GOT THE JOB. That makes us feel REALLY weird. If you are so unbelievably mind-blowingly amazing, AND you’re our last candidate, AND we are not tied down by regulations (and 99% of the time we are), we will tell you. But mainly we can’t, even if we wanted to.
9) ALSO DON’T ASK about vacation, time off, sick time, maternity, pay, if you get an admin. Ask about professional development opportunities, new initiatives, “what’s a typical day” (we will say there isn’t one, laugh, and make something up), “what do you like about this company”, etc.
10) DO SOME RESEARCH. We can tell, and it totally impresses us. Drop that old “I noticed on your website…” on us and we’ll be eating out of your hand.
11) ANSWER ALL PARTS OF THE QUESTIONS. If you forget a part, just ask for a repeat. If you don’t understand, say something. We don’t expect you to memorize it. And if it sounds like we’re trying to make you say something in particular, we are.
12) KEEP IT PROFESSIONAL. We don’t care about your life outside of work. If we need an example of something and you have to go outside your professional experience, that’s okay. But don’t tell us stories about your kids.
So the cherry blossoms have finally arrived, along with a ridiculous amount of pollen. I’ve been mouth-breathing for about a week now. I think the symptoms have settled into a nice manageable rhythm, but I’ll be stuck with this until maybe July. I never used to have allergies.
But that’s not DC love. This is: I love that around here, DC is either called “The District” or “Downtown”. That just charms the shit out of me. First of all, it just sounds awesome when you say something like, “Oh, I need to head into The District today.” It reminds me a little of The Hunger Games, without, you know, the gladiatorial battles featuring children. I really like the term “Downtown” though. We don’t live IN DC, we live in a nearby town. That town certainly does have its own downtown. But when I say, “My husband works downtown,” everyone knows that means DC. I just love it. An entire city is ‘downtown’.
AGH! Post-spam! But I saw my 2012 list and thought, I need a 2013. ‘Cause I know y’all are simple dying for an update.
- Raspberry Pi
- Text-based gaming
- Non-text-based gaming
- Body modification. Okay, yeah, I’ve been collecting piercings and the one tattoo for years, but this is the year of dye-hair-weird-colors and wear-strange-nail-polish. Also, thinking about more piercings. Also, *whisper*, thinking of having the ink embellished a little. Yes, I know I said never again with the needles, but…
- Interval training
Today I’m pretty sure I saw a semi run a hatchback off the road on the Beltway.
But in other news, know what’s awesome? EVERYONE is following the progress of the cherry blossoms with big anime eyes. You can walk up to a total stranger and be like, hey, sucks that the blossoms are late this year and they’ll say “I KNOW RIGHT? Fucking cold March.”
We went to the kite festival last weekend, and because we’re natives now we could tell from the Mall that the blossoms were absent. We watched the rokkaku battle, as is tradition, and the kite I picked to win came from behind to take 2nd place in the last heat. I don’t have a picture of it, because I was too excited to remember to take one. The team flying it were probably wondering what the tall shouty girl was so excited about, but I hope it made them feel good to have one REALLY BIG fan from out of nowhere.
Here’s my artsy photo of the kite ring and the monument, which is still closed due to earthquake damage. See that loudspeaker in the corner? Yeah, I meant to include that.